It should come as no surprise that women test men. But how do women test men? The best example I ever heard was that women don't have the time to be nice to every man that approaches them. Every guy presents themselves as confident and like a great catch but the only way a woman will know is to test. Basically she has to put pressure on you and see if you break. Do you bend to her will just to make her happy or get laid? The author of this video reads an email a woman wrote him explaining how she tests men and it should come as no surprise as you watch this video that if you are trying to fake your way through it you will fail eventually.
We created our products so you can naturally be confident in yourself and not care about her reactions so you automatically pass all these tests because they are a part of you, not a tactic. Now enjoy and learn a thing or two so you're ready.
I've got a really cool email here from a woman and she writes in, and she describes a couple ways that she goes about: testing men, that she's either dating or on a date with or guys that she meets to see what they're made of now the average Guy really has no idea that most women are testing them to see what they're made of they do things to try to see if a guy will change his opinion or go back on his word because he's just trying to match hers.
In other words, I want to know that you got a spine, that you stand up for yourself and what you believe in. So that was a great email to share, and I got a quote that I wrote in this topic and when I go right through her email and the quote says: men don't get that women test their strength and worthiness to see if they are confident alphas or indecisive betas. Men and women are both naturally and biologically attracted to the most dominant members of the opposite sex, the more beautiful you are, the happier you are, the better your body is the more outgoing and confident you are the more Successful you are and getting you what you want in life, the more members of the opposite sex are going to find you desirable and attractive.
Humans are built to seek out partners with the best genes. This is so they will produce the strongest children that can survive and become adults. Procreate and pass on the family genes seek to make your body in your life the best you can be in order to attract the best quality mates. Let's go through her email, hi coach Wayne, I'm a 41 year old single divorced mom with a great career.
I own my own house and I've been able to provide for my three-year-old daughter after 16 years of marriage. I found myself single. I got a good friend of mine that had been married for about 15 years. I just found out recently that he and his wife had split up. I was pretty shocked and surprised because he was one of the few people out of them. What this kind of thing that, if you borrow if you ever, saw the old Chevy Chase movie National Lampoon's Christmas vacation, where Eddie comes in and Clark Griswold played by Chevy Chase, he says I would not be more surprised if I woke up tomorrow with my head.
So into the carpet than I am right now, obviously, with cousin Eddie being there in his living room, and that was when things I was shocked. Dear my buddy, say yeah we're done were split up. I was like what I was like dude. That was the last thing. I expected you to tell me when we got together today, but people and I was like people don't want to admit – what's really going on in their lives, so only afterwards you find out.
Oh okay. So that's what was really going on there hooks can definitely be deceiving. She said I took two years to focus on myself, which was great and I'm now back in the dating scene. I've always been told that I'm an alpha female at first. It used to bother me, but now I embrace it well, it's definitely a compliment to you. Having said that, I'm also very traditional when it comes to male and female relationships, I love to cook and keep a clean home.
I like to be there for my partner through both bad times and good. Well, a lot of women struggle with MU, especially when it comes to their career they're in their masculine in order to excel in their career, but when they get home at night, it's hard for them to take kind of take off that masculine armor and slip back Into their feminine energy and be more womanly, if you will, I don't have issues getting asked out on dates and in fact some of my friends have told me that they've never seen any one person get asked out.
As often as I do. However, I don't serial date and I really do want something substantial and so here what's interesting is she gives a couple of examples of how she goes about testing the average guy to see what the hell he's made of she said. I've learned more about myself through your book and your website, then I have with other female specific, dating coaches, I'm finally, understanding why I'm attracted to some men, while I'm completely turned off by others.
I've said many times I talked about in the book. It's like the average woman doesn't really understand what she's attractive she's got an idea of what she's supposed to be attracted because that's what society says. But when you actually look at the characteristics of the guys they date and are in long-term relationships versus the guys they blow off in friendzone, it's usually the opposite of what they say.
They want find that interesting and you can see the average guy when he asked a woman for advice she goes into. I don't want to hurt his feelings mode and says things hoping he'll figure it out, but really often just leaves him more confused than anything. That was the thing I started like my late 20s, my early 30s. He started realizing it's not a good idea as much as I love my female girlfriends to be taking daily advice for them because they, quite frankly, don't really understand things.
It's like they say they want one thing, but then, when you look at the guys that they're dating like wait a minute, you say you don't like this type of guy, but this is exactly the way your boyfriend is. It's like huh she's here here are two things I do on dates to test these men that I thought might be of interest to you. Listen up guys number one when a man sets a day a time and a place for a date.
I automatically agree so far so good. Once I arrive, I typically suggest that we try another place down the road. I do this to see if they will stay in their ground and say something like let's just stay here. Let me think I really want to go to a place and you've thought out where you want to meet, because it's a cool place. It feels like hey, hey, let's go and you're looking forward to being there and you really want to be there.
You don't really want to go, and now somebody's got ta if she's got a better idea like let's go check it out, but if you really want to be there, you're like well, let's just get a drink here and see how it goes we're already here now We already put our name in the list, that's what I took there were only if, like get into my car driving on the road anyways, that's how I would approach it, but, like said then the average guy who doesn't know any better he's goes into super pleaser Mode, what's he thinking? Okay? Well, you know: let's go down the street, not cuz.
He wants to go down. The street he's only going down a street because it's what she wants to do now, because he's going to that's a great idea, that's even better than this place. Let's go do that and that's what she's looking for she's looking for a guy that stands up for himself from what he believes her, not a dude, it's a doormat or a please or a guy. It's wanting to wait on her hand and foot and be a butler, because that dudes never going to stand up for himself he's, never going to say what he really thinks and therefore, because he's not saying and speaking and doing what he really thinks.
She can't really trust his masculine core. She doesn't really know what the guy, what she's working with men, who are sure themselves make a woman, feel confident and safe and guys who are indecisive or who were pleasers, are weak by nature and therefore, if they're, in or in any real physical danger, deep down. They're going to be wondering with this guy defend me or he just haul ass and leave me to fend for myself and number two there's a second way that she test guys when a man sets a date time and place at a sports bar.
I automatically agree within one drink and conversation. I suggest that we play darts shuffleboard bowling or shoot some pool it's an interesting is i. These are some of the things I suggest in my book now. The reason I suggest these in the book from a guy's perspective is because it enables you to have some physical interaction, whether you're playing pool playing darts. You can be playful and have fun occasionally you're, like the bratty little sister.
Ninety percent of time you charming James Bond 10 % of time, you're messing with her a little bit plus it gives because you're standing it gives her the ability to touch you or to punch your arm playfully, and that causes the touch thing to start. Anyone. That's touching starts you as a guy you're, going to escalate that a little further. Well, obviously, you can't keep your hands off me. You might as well just get it over with and kiss me because I receive a you're.
Looking at me, I mean come on. You'd, be playful have fun. The idea is to be ridiculous. It's not to be serious, it's to be ridiculous and absurd and fun and playful, because I mean let's face it. Life is difficult enough as it is. We all have enough challenges in our workplace in our lives, and you go on a date you want to escape. You want to be with somebody that you can have a good time with and laugh with, and obviously in this situation, when you're doing physical things together it what it does, it creates the conditions we're touching can happen because the bottom line is touching leads to heavy Petting heavy petting leads to kissing kissing, leads to let's go someplace, it's more quiet or intimate, so the seduction can continue.
So she continues on it's nothing so, from the woman's perspective. Here's how she's looking at this! This is why she suggests to do these things. She says it's not about the game itself, but I like to see what their competitive side is like and how they deal under pressure. So, if you're, the type of guy that, like, if you're playing golf with your buddies and you're, taking strokes off your scorecard there.
If you're playing darts with a girl and you're trying to clean points or things that really aren't yours, obviously it's going to reveal some things about your character. She says, won't see Halle hell a deal with under pressure, maybe she's really good in darts and she's playing a guy that sucks in darts. Now, if a guy is deeply insecure about himself and she whips his ass and darts and teases him about it, and he, and instead of smiling and laughing and off like it, doesn't bother if it like literally gets in her skinny, and she could tell it's making Him angry: do you think she's going to feel more safe with that guy, or do you think she's going to pull back a little bit and start putting the walls up a little bit more? It's very very important not to lose your, so she continues on.
It gives me a huge insight, and vice just by doing these two things, and it's helped me gauge which man will be a better fit for me. I forget: what's chapter in your book covers this, but you are obviously right. I'm not wrong even when I make what I do is incorrect. It's about what their demeanor is like and how comfortable they are with their physical space not just that they planned a date.
In other words, do they get butthurt if they're losing, if she's kicking their ass in pool? Do they get butthurt and say? Well, let's play something else: it's very important! Your commute, we communicate. I think it's like 75 percent of what we communicate is body language physiology. Just our presence, I don't remember the exact statistics, I'm sure somebody will probably post it under the email somewhere.
I wrote about in the book, but it's been so long. I forgot what the numbers are exactly, but it's like the actual words that you communicate. I think it's only like 10 15 percent of what you communicator the actual word. So it's your vibe, it's a tone of your voice. It's the look on your face that tells a woman everything about you and how you're reacting to this situation. If you're on a first date and you're already getting butthurt and upset because she kicked your ass in pool, it's going to be very hard to get a second date out when you're behaving that way.
So she says my question, for you is the following: what advice do you have for alpha females to better spot men that have these male substantial qualities, obviously reading the book and knowing it backwards and forwards? So you know the traits to look for because we're all guilty this men and women both when you really like somebody remember human beings. We make decisions based upon our emotions and we use logic and reason to justify our decision and often happens when you find somebody and you're really attracted to them.
And you see those red flags popping up that show they're undesirable characteristics, but because you're really into that person, you make an excuse from oh well, I can change them or I'd get her to loosen up or I can get her to change your opinion or I Can get her to to treat me in a way that she's never treated anybody else just because I'm so much more awesome. We all do that. I'r guilty of that.
I had a girlfriend from a couple of years ago, and this was my Brazilian girlfriend and I remember after we had split up, I was thinking. How could I possibly attract it? Somebody in my life, who had so many things that I liked because like for me, it's very rare in my life to find somebody that is growth. Oriented that's healthy that I'm really attracted to that has the same goals that has the same values has the same interest in spirituality, the same spiritual outlook in life, somebody that's a business owner or entrepreneur type.
Somebody that I really jive with you know. I think about all the people I've met in my life that actually have the same spiritual beliefs that I do it's very rare, and so, when I do encounter somebody like that, it's just the conversations we have lasts all hours of the day and night. It's exciting and compelling to me, and so I remember a question. My sum was like how could I attract a woman in my life after everything, I've experienced everything.
I've learned it was a horrible communicator whose answer whenever there was a problem was I don't want to talk about it, and what I came to realize was that everything you do everything you are everything you embody gives off a vibe and at that particular time my Life when I attracted her, I was still in the process of delegating away a lot of the things that I was doing because as you'll read in my second book, which is a matter of fact, I just wrote the conclusion to last night.
So we're getting really close to being done with the editing in the second book, but you know, like I was saying, is that what I came to recognize is at that particular time. When I met her, I wasn't as chilled out and relaxed I hadn't delegates.
There was still a lot of things in my life and my business. I was doing that I didn't want to do, but I hadn't delegated those things away to other people, and so I was in a lot more stressed placed vibrationally, obviously than I am today, and your outer world tends to be a reflection of your inner role.
That's like when I think back to like my late 20s, like after I left my wife. It was like the women that I was meeting and dating remember. I still had a belief back then that deep down I didn't feel like I deserved what I wanted and I oftentimes was attracted to women that either had mediocre interest in me or weren't, really that into me, and so at that time, in my life I tended To attract a lot of women into my life that really just weren't that into me – and I was still thinking I'm going to talk to him into liking me more or wanted me more going out on more dates, and it's true, some of them as long as They're on a scale of 1 to 10, there are five at least as far as Attraction level.
You can get them to fall for you over time by doing more things right than wrong, but it was just. It was a reflection of where I was vibrationally because of how I perceive myself or the vibration that I put out into the world that determined that I would literally attract women that were kind of on the same wavelength. That I was that's where I placed such a huge emphasis when people are like well, how do I attract the kind of person that I want? It's really to become the kind of person that you want to attract and the beauty of the universe is.
Is that when you have a blind spot or you have a weakness or you got a part of your life that maybe you need to place more attention on, then you have been, or maybe it's a part of your life you're, just ignoring the universe, will bring. Somebody into your life, a woman, obviously, if you're a guy who's, really going to test that that chink in your armor and so the lesson for me with my Brazilian girlfriend was I needed to delegate even more things away and he really needed to focus even more.
On my life and having a more stress-free life, but it was one of the reasons why I was so excited to get to a place where I was living in the beach. So I could embody that beach bum kind of vibe, because you know years before when I was still in the real estate and I lived on a lake. So I had a lot of a lot of staff. We had 40 employees at two business partners, and so I had 10 15 different people that when I had things that need to be done, I could delegate those away too, and so, as my business grow, I was slowly adding more people.
You know eventually added a full-time assistant who's been with me for about a few years, almost three years now delegate a lot of the things away that had to be done, but that I didn't enjoy doing and that helped me be into a more peaceful and relaxed State now to me that was the gift. That was a lesson that I experienced from the Brazilian girlfriend that I had but, like I said, if you look at any time, especially as the older you get and you look back in your life and you look at the the friends and yeah it's like my Business, you know the business I had in real estate.
You know when I met those guys. I had just left my wife. We were all working together. I was building a new business. I had a lot of stress happening in my life. There are a lot of things I hadn't overcome, and so the business partners that I had guess what they brought a lot of stress into my life and my business relationship and I tended to hire employees that also tended to bring more stress and drama into my Life, but if I look at with like the business that I have today, is it everybody that works for me now, they're all in for the most part other than my assistant, they're, all independent contractors, everybody I give them objectives to achieve and things that I want To accomplish it's up to them to figure out their schedule and work when it's convenient for them, so it's like the way I've set.
My life up now has caused me to attract people into my life, who are all kind of on that same kind of vibe, because you are going to attract exactly how you act if you're in a stress, State you're going to attract women to date. You're going to attract friends in your life and you're, going to attract clients into your life that are really going to challenge your ability to remain in a peaceful and relaxed state, because remember we're always going to do our best work when we're relaxed more chilled out And so that should be something that's always in the back of all of our minds and when we're building our life and our lifestyle out is we want to have it full of people who add to calmness, who add to our feeling a sense of peace and Being relaxed and not being stressed out, because when you tolerate those people in your life, guess what what you observe you participate in and if you tolerate those kind of people in your life that bring stress in your life you're, actually communicating the University.
You want. More of that and guess what the universe will definitely provide based on where you're at vibrationally so back to our email here. So she says I personally don't care what kind of job the man has as long as he's confident comfortable with his physical space can step up when needed and is steadfast with his decision-making process and oh, he should be a great kisser too. So again, it's like.
I was saying it's really about creating a life and lifestyle and becoming the kind of person. That's going to attract that kind of guy that you want into your life. Are you somebody who's confident? Are you comfortable in your own physical space? Can you take care of what needs to be done? Obviously anybody that is an alpha male or an alpha female when something needs to get done in their lives when something needs to get handled, they do it the Alpha, handles it and takes action.
The beta doesn't so think about your friendships. Think about the people that you spend your time with if you're a high achiever, but most of the people that you spend your time with, are low achievers well again, you're communicating to the universe that you're. Okay with that vibration, therefore, the universe going to send you more people like that. So it's really super important that you know, as it's been said, you're going to become like the five people that you spend most of your time with.
So you've got to be very careful about who you allow into your inner circle and who you spend your your time with, because whatever the vibe is that those five people are giving off. That's exactly what you're going to get more of in life. Definitely something to think about.